White People Aren’t Showing Exceptional Racism but The Human Norm For Dealing w/ Tragedy

The ‘us and them’ pandemic shows America is still impervious to black pain

“Blacks are Dying from Corona Virus and Whites Don’t Care”

If this was a headline it would be overly simplistic due to the all or nothing reasoning. The statement is too black and white (pun intended lol) to be totally accurate but it’s pretty close. The article I linked you to did tell me something I hadn’t considered; people began protesting the stay at home orders when the stats about race and the virus became widespread news. Pkus, the protesters are white and we’ll off. I didn’t know that. I also didn’t know there’s a new code word for black, like “urban” or “at-risk” or “inner city.” Whites talk about “demographics.” As in, “you look at the ‘demographics’ and you feel there’s nothing to worry about,” say whites in the article. And they say it with a shrug and a smirk. I imagine white people thinking: “Oh well. Sucks to be them. Anyway…” I felt angry until I realized an essential truth: the reaction is not a white reaction but a human one.

It is my firm belief that if white people are indifferent to black pain, as the writer posits, it is not necessarily a reflwction of extraordinarily bad race relations. Nor is said indifference proof that whites are particularly hard hearted. We are witnessing an altogether ordinary, not extraordinary way humans deal with threats to life and limb. What do survivors of tragedies always, not sometimes, but always say? They never thought it could happen to them. Other people, sure. Something you read about in the paper…but me? Us? Here? No way. The only way we can get through lives of powerlessness is to cling to the illusion of imperviousness. I wrote a post about surviving the jungles of Vietnam. Vets that made it back knew they could’ve been killed but believed they never would get shot. What else can you do so you don’t do stark raving mad.

If You Believe the Bible You Accept That Delight Bc Tragedy Happens to Others is to be celebrated🎁

One way of looking at the celebration of Passover is that it is Schadenfreude. The Jews enslaved in Egypt celebrated when the Angel of Death passed over their homes, with the doorframes anointed with the blood of the lamb, and took the first born sons from Egyptian families. That’s codified schadenfreude, or delight in another’s misfortune. Maybe the emphasis of the celebration is not happiness that others are suffering but happiness that we are not. It’s splitting hairs. For thousands of years we have understood that it’s human nature to turn a blind eye to the problems of others, especially when we escaped a similar fate.

Any scrap of evidence is used to support the confirmation bias we all have as humans that horrible things we are powerless to prevent, Sony happen to us. This innate confirmation bias is why whites are relieved to write off corona virus as a black thing. That’s a normal human reaction. There’s always some guilt when you discover that, for example, the firetrucks were rushing to a house near yours but not yours. We feel guilty we aren’t noble enough to wish upon ourselves a fair portion of suffering. We simply are not noble. Was it Paul who wrote “in this flesh dwells no good thing”?

If corona virus were seen as a white thing, you’d be hardpressed to find many in the black community sympathetic to the White man’s pain. The difference would be we wouldn’t feel any guilt for not clamoring on behalf of whites bc whites have everything they need and don’t need our community concern.

Maybe I sound like I don’t think much of humanity. One thing I don’t appear to be in this post, is wrong. Do thesr words ring true to anyone else?

A Honolulu Building, Century Center, Is Said To Be a Hotbed of Organized Prostitution. 2 Things People Who Care Need To Know: See Brief News Link


Two (2) Important Points

A List of Important Century Center Facts
  • Massage has nothing to do with prostitution. Hawaii has a great law that limits the use of the word “massage” to establishments staffed and supervised by licensed massage therapists. Hence the name “relaxation spa.” Yes, massage can be sexual. So can movies or any number of things I need not name bc you get the point. Massage therapists have worked hard to change the totally wrong idea that massage therapy is not only prostitution but is also unskilled, a con job, a RIP off, and utterly lacking in therapeutic value. Massage therapists are educated professionals who are licensed by the state of Hawaii. Licensed massage therapists take a state licensing exam that tests anatomy, massage technique and law. They must acquire over 600 training hours. No massage establishment was raided this weekend. I know there isn’t a relaxation establishment using the word massage in its name. The media should follow suit.
    • Service providers accompany the police during the raid so they will be on hand? What services do they provide to the trafficked? Those establishments are often staffed by Asian immigrants who don’t speak English and use the translator phone app to communicate with clients. I know bc I have asked guys what those places are like. I never worked in one because they are strictly for Asians. The long ago times I went to inquire about work someone told me later everyone there thought I was an undercover cop. Funny! But I had advantages since I speak English and I wouldn’t have needed to live there, like their workers usually do. Close those places and you add to the homeless population that Honolulu officials seem to dislike enormously. Those establishments don’t want trouble so they are good neighbors. Guys arriving and departing do NOT want to draw attention to themselves. People are bothered by the idea of activities they can only assume are taking place when these common establishments (unfortunately nicknamed amp’s for Asian massage parlors) do no actual harm to complaining neighbors. Now what will those women do? With luck, they’ll find housing in a new relaxation parlor bc I doubt the service providers can replace the entire way of life they snatched from society’s most desperate. Am I in favor of exploitation? No. I’m in favor of a real alternative. Social workers on hand to help victims during the police raid…yeah, right

In conclusion

Massage Therapists are not Hookers

Brothels are not Massage Establishments

Police Raids Create Different Problems that effect the same people. Problems are shifted not solved but we probably need that to keep cerain parts if society from growing uncontrollably. Like a yin and yang balance thing.

For God’s Sake Don’t Mention You’ve Been To Prison! You’re Not Habilitat! – Sexy, Funny Video/Verse unmasks forbidden intimate taboos in Honolulu


For God’s Sake Don’t Mention You’ve Been To Prison! You’re Not Habilitat!

Using Mugshots for Your Headshot

There’s a well known drug treatment program here in Honolulu named Habilitat. It was founded by someone who, like me, was a Native New Yorker. Bonnie Marino was a charismatic leader. The programs strength seemed to be the magnetism of his personality, although he could certainly be quite rude. Habilitat operated on the principle that there is therapeutic value in humiliation, both public and private. I can’t believe I lasted six months in a place where you were stood in front if the 200+ member family and called any name as long as it wasn’t racial and didn’t constitute a threat of violence. I protested to Habilitat staffers that “bitch” and “whore” were not healing words, but an extension and perpetuation of the rampant misogyny among addicts. No one cared what I thought. Nothing is perfect. There were beneficial aspects if the Habilitat program and if anyone is interested I can tell you some stories. The most intriguing part of the program was that Vinnie Marino, and all of the other top staffers, had their mugshots enlarged to poster size. Lists of all the criminal charges they had accumulated in their drug days were placed under one mug shot. I don’t know how they picked the best mug shot out to represent each one of them. Past and present directors were shown, like pictures of the presidents of the United States one sees in federal buildings, except the presidential pictures don’t have any captions other than date of tenure. The Habilitat program is a fixture in Hawaii. Many prominent, wealthy donors have always supported Habilitat. People come from all over the country to join the 2.5 year program and pay tens of thousands of dollars for the privilege. Vinnie Marino left fruit that still remains and he used his criminal history as a selling point. Could I do the same? Use my criminal past a selling point for my blog and my as yet to be discovered products?

No talk of prison!

No, people don’t understand. No, people will not accept you for who you are. At first. You can’t lead with the prison thing. Vinnie Marino probably didn’t lead with ‘Im an ex-con, let me tell you about Habilitat.’ He probably drew people bc of his success, and then told them who he was. No one’s perfect and everyone knows that. But you have to have enough sense not to put your weaknesses on your resume and not to tell your deep dark secrets on a first date. Get your readers first. Then tell them about prison.

A long time blog fan giving me much sought after good advice that I just didn’t take. Isn’t it ironic?
It is too late to unring the bell and hide my past. I can’t put my best foot forward so I just offer you my foot (lol). If you’re a reader you probably know already I am an alum of two very different institutions–college and corrections. Moreover, you are aware that my life now is not like most of the people who grad from Harvard or the Women’s Community Correctional Center (Double U Triple C, WCCC). My unique, honest personal story is I have tales of addiction driven street sex and related issues, and I use the skills my elite education gave me to artfully tell you all about being a hooker. Do I appeal to a narrow niche? You betcha. Still, I’m delighted to have a niche at all and someone other than spell check for a reader.
What’s most important is not to be imprisoned by thoughts that make me tell myself I can never make it work. I won’t be my own warden.

Transgender people might buy into traditional gender roles as the rightest wing Republican family values type

What’s revolutionary about women wearing dresses?

Have transgender people accepted society’s traditional view of male and female roles? Maybe so. Conservatives say, “boys are like this, girls are like that. Toe the line.” Transgender people seem to use traditional standards as the jumping off point. They fully accept the standard gender roles and when they assume their new gender, act exactly the way society says that gender should behave. Men who become women dress the way I expect women to dress, and the same with women who become men.

I thought gender roles were changing but the change is in who can assume traditional gender roles

I was the one who was mistaken when I thought it was a revolution in gender roles. In fact gender roles are so immutable that if you want to act like, or dress like a certain gender, you have to get a sex change. Or at the very least, self identify as the gender that matches appropriate actions and attire. Is there really progress in locking down what men and women have to be?

True Words From a Predatory Working Girl About What She Does and Why

Money and sex are inextricably connected in a variety of ways. Here’s what that connection looks like when a provider is out to get hers in a hostile world.


  I have never before been accused of being too nice, but that changed when long ago I shared some musings with a seasoned pro.  I was contemplating providing companionship that really uplifted people, something outside of the usual impersonal encounters. I wanted to be a supportive person in that one hour we spend together so a client could feel encouraged. There were times I felt I should do more to bring positivity, maybe by offering more of my real self. A 28 year old “relaxation” worker corrected me: 

You are not there to be nice. The guys are not thinking about how to be nicer to you. They are not worried about encouraging you. They already think you’re getting over on them if you get a little bit of money from them. So give them what they want.  The only thing you have to do in that hour is figure out how to waste most of the time without doing too much to him. Give him a shower. Massage his shoulders. You can waste a lot of time on the stiff neck.   I make at least $1000 a day. That’s not even having sex. I just give massages. Well, I don’t say “Massage” bc I don’t have a license. I just say “I’m an aspiring masseuse” and I give back rubs.”  For a lot of guys I don’t even have to do that. They give me thousands of dollars just to listen to them. They have a lot going on and they don’t have anyone to talk to.I can see why some of them want to take a shotgun and blow people easy. But that is not my problem as long as he doesn’t come at me with a gun. I try to figure out everything about him. What was he attracted to about the website? Then why did he pick me out of everyone on the site? I talk to him about making the session’s time something he can count as a tax write off. Then I can figure out his tax bracket and where I fit into that bracket. Maybe his job has given him a certain amount of money to spend and I want to make sure I get all of it. When I want to get some kind of business license or physical therapy license or whatever I’ll just buy it like everyone else does. No one really studies for those licensing exams. The point is this: get as much ad you can and give up as little ad you can. Its never about helping people. Its only about getting the money. Those same people you want to help by caring about what they say or making sure they get their money’s worth, or being fair to them…those are the same people who will throw you over for pennies. If you think about being nice you’ll be too hurt when you find out the not nice things they think about you.

     Do I need to kill human kindness to work with people in this companionship way, I wondered when I first began Given what society thinks of my profession I discovered that all the condemnation I received from the guys and from all the people who found out where I have been, all that judgement naturally kills any inclination to be overly nice. I settled on being fair, not robbing people. I was never as consciously conniving as the woman I interviewed but mostly bc I couldn’t be bothered and not bc I didn’t want to be like her.

The Real Life Offbeat Encounters That Influenced 9 Point Sex Standards List: #1 Adult

Experience has taught me that I only want to deal with adults. Someone asked me to get him someone who is 7, and I realize that seven is not going to be followed by the word “teen. ” The guy wanted a seven year old. That’s a no so definite I don’t have to say anything I just hung up the phone

It’s a bit disconcerting to hear someone you’ve had sex with call you Auntie. That’s the respectful way younger people address women older than them or how senior women address each other. The age of consent in Hawaii was raised to 16 from 14 a few years ago, the exception to the rule is that 14 and 15 year olds can have sex with someone not more than 5 years older. There was nothing illegal about being with a17 year old, checking the Identification that he used for the school bus to make sure he is legal. But it is disturbing. The young generation posts milestones before they even get dressed. I know bc I asked him what he was doing on his phone while I was getting dressed. And they don’t use Facebook. Instagram, I think.

But worst of all was my feeling that I was no good for him. He was so unnaturally nice. Is this alrighty, is that alright? Was he mocking me? Then I thought, maybe nice is normal and that’s why I come across as so mean. I may not recognize true niceness when I see it. I never had much experience with kindness and I certainly don’t need to pass on my cynicism to the youth. I blocked his number. I will deal with adults who come to me damaged rather than ruining anyone

Modern Gambling Link–https://www.forbes. com/sites/sergeiklebnikov/2020/05/21/here-are-all-the-crazy-things-people-are-betting-on-without-live-sports/#5b607aa61e34

Evidently, People will bet on anything that is an ongoing event with a well defined, limited possible conclusions. I am on the outside looking in, but from this point of view it appears that the potential outcomes must be definite and not open ended, so people know how to bet. Win, lose, tie. Number of points ahead or behind. Late, early or on time. It is only exciting if the outcome is not known, although it is profitable to cheat, but cheating takes the excitement out of it, changes the game from gambling (chance) to theft (certainty). The internet is perfectly fine because I guess you don’t have to be a participant in the action to enjoy the action. Here in Honolulu there are dingy game rooms that are supposedly illegal but everyone says they operate with the bought and paid for consent of the powers that be. I have been to the game rooms. They are totally unappealing. The fact that I can’t imagine myself getting caught up in the game rooms is the main reason why I don’t gamble. I will explain.

Gambling In Hawaii Seems Unappealing, That’s Why I Don’t Do It

Game rooms are nondescript store fronts in commercial areas. They don’t have a sign that says “Game Room,” but they are not really hidden. You’d have to know what you are looking for, There is always a camera system monitored by large men who open the door for you if they recognize you. Some are small, like a quarter of the size of a 7-11. I have seen others that are large, the size of two or three 7-11’s. There always have a couch or two for people to sit on when they are not playing. The perimeter is lined with slot machine video games. Even from the outside you can hear the constant pressing of buttons, banging really. People sit on stools to play the slot games, but it appears that the real money is made by the large games that are the size of pool tables. People say these are the “fish games.” The poor quality graphics remind me of the Atari Ms. Pacman I had in the 1980’s. The object is to shoot the various fish that swim by, but the real money is won by hitting the huge fish. People who live in game rooms, and they virtually do live there, swear that there is strategy to the games, that they are hitting the buttons and making something happen rather than the machine chooses when one of the shots takes out a fish. I don’t know but I am skeptical of strategy. Someone who was once one of the most successful contractors in the state (if I told you his business locals would know who he is), he told me that in Vegas the Gaming Commission requires that the machines give back 90% of the money they take in. Here in Hawaii the unregulated machines keep 60% of the winnings. I once stood beside him and watched him feed one hundred dollar bill after another into a machine that did not ever register progress, as far as I could see. The machine will say you are winning, you are up, the dollar amounts keep climbling and if you quit while you are ahead and cash out, you’ll be ok. But people usually, as they say “give it back.” They put their winnings from cashing out back into the machine or they don’t cash out at all and watch the numbers go up, up, up and then crash. It’s like watching the stocks you invest in decline, but the rise and fall happens as you watch, and people have the feeling they can do something to correct reversals. No one wants to play with me around because I won’t give the $100 I am told you have to start with. I don’t believe I will win and therefore any money I put into the jingling machine with its flashing lights is “scared money.” Everyone knows scared money is lost money. Game rooms are the domain of crystal meth, or “ice.” There’s always someone selling ice. There are always people smoking ice in the bathroom or nodded out after days of not sleeping, sitting on a toilet, ice pipe still firmly clutched in their semi-conscious hand. There’s always a watchful person taking in the money, usually an older Asian woman people call the “mama-san” whether that’s culturally appropriate or not.

People Win All The Time

No one I have encountered has ever known anyone in Hawaii that has caught COVID-19. But everyone I know who goes to the game room has won. Everyone. $50, $100, $1500, $6500, $19,000, $27000. In a nutshell, if you play often enough you will win because the computer is programmed to let people win based on some program or algorithm, which is why I doubt that strategy factors in to a person’s success at hitting the fish. The winning is the hook. I have never won anything, and so I speak from experience when I say that losing is not addictive. Losing does not create a desire within to lose again and lose yet again. There is no relentless craving to lose that is stoked by repetitive thoughts that replay the loss. Thoughts of losing don’t overwhelm me so that there is nothing I can do to make it stop but just go back and get it over with. Maybe then I will have some peace. Drug addiction is like that, losing at gambling is not. Yet I don’t go back to the game rooms. I am not generally a lucky person but maybe even I would win if I put in thousands. Do I try it out? I do not. Game rooms are powerful and I respect that power.

Game rooms are usually visually off putting, with all the unwashed people taking birdbaths in the bathroom sinks and the odd bed bug crawling into the crevices of the machines. Why do I fear the power of yucky places like that? Because too many people are too caught up to make gambling addiction imaginary. The fact that people are drawn to such places shows me their power. The beauty of being a mature person who is honest with herself is that I know I am eligible to be snared by the unimaginable. Young people, maybe all people, think they are invulnerable. If we humans knew how truly vulnerable we are to any and every catastrophe whether we are sitting still, sleeping, or driving, or whatever, the fear might incapacitate us. I do not ponder my chances of a blood vessel in my brain bursting, that would be pointless. I assume I am fine because what else can I do? But I do not assume I will be fine if I actually win and feel the euphoria some people describe as better than sex. I can’t imagine falling victim to gambling but just because I can’t imagine the threat doesn’t make the threat unreal.

One hallmark of addiction is that the once inconceivable becomes routine, even humdrum.

A person who never thought she would ever, ever work as a prostitute can now say to someone: “Wait for me here while I do this. I’m going to go get this money real quick and then we can go get that. I will be back in like, 8 minutes.”

When it comes to gambling, I don’t even dabble.

Incontrovertible Sex Standards List–The 9 Non’s. Everyone must develop his/her own list like this


Incontrovertible Sex Standards List–The 9 Non’s. Everyone must develop his/her own list like this

No, this sex worker won’t do anything and everything sexual under the sun. In fact, she is probably more clear about her boundaries than women who haven’t had to deal with these issues as often and under such a variety of sexual circumstances. Here’s a list of NON-NEGOTIABLE NO EXCEPTION  sex standards. The “9 non’s” is what I call the list. 

The list has developed and evolved over the years as people made sex requests for things I never thought about.  I had to think carefully about who I was, bc believe it or not, a person does not always know what’s truly ok unless she defines her foundational beliefs in advance. I have been faced with a new situation I never would have thought of in a lifetime. I was like, “I guess so…let’s see how it goes.” Things went along and I’d have to say “stop, that’s not ok. I changed my mind.” And the guy would understandably be mad bc he had done all the securing of permission women advocates said a guy must do, and it was like I was kind of accusing him of doing something not ok. I didn’t want to plant a root of bitterness in a guy which would cause him to give up on getting permission–and just have at it. But more importantly, I wanted to know my own mind.

I say every Man and woman should have this ongoing discussion with self, working boy/girl or not. No one wants regret after the fact.  

You must erect your own sex directional signs

📝 The 9 Non’s, A Sex Standards List

The 9 Non’s for All partners:
1. Adult
2. Homo Sapien or Human
3. Happy
4. Willing/Consenting
5. Conscious
6. Alive
7. Physically non-threatening
8. Not involved with biohazardous waste
9. Flexibly Respectful

Circumstances change but I never do. I can count on myself to be the same Me. And that’s a nice feeling of strength and stability.

I am always the same me. This makes sense if you believe we are made in God’s image and God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. (I don’t know that I believe in God as I’ve learned about God but I couldn’t resist making the point!)

I will explain each one of the 9 Non’s in the following 9 posts. Next up, a thorough explanation of what adult means to me.

A Dead Teenager Lives on in my Mind and My Changing Opinion of Her Mirrors the Change in ME

How my changing feelings about a dead teenager reveal the start of compassion. When I was a child my achievement level ranged from successful to not-as-successful. After taking a test in second grade I was placed in “giftef and talented” and never again had class with “regular” kids. All I knew was judgment, competition. I had never experienced failure and looked down upon losers, as I had been taught by a system that lists students from best to worse in “class rank.” In high school I was watching 60 Minutes and the story of Becky B. was shown. She had died bc her state’s law required minors to obtain written parental consent for abortions. For reasons we can never know, she was afraid to do so. She sought an underground solution from someone of dubious qualifications in a non medical setting. She died from the resulting infection. Guilty and heartbroken, her parents were campaigning to do away with the parental consent requirement.

Do you know what I thought, then. With all of the hatred I felt for women who didn’t want their babies, the way I imagined I hadn’t been wanted, I thought “she got what she deserved.” She was a bad person who compounded her bad deeds with worse deeds and, well, what can a person expect? We all know the wages of sin. I cringe as I remember saying those words, none of them originating with me. Yet i thought I waz the author of my mentality which is pretty funny. Or would be if it weren’t so sad.

Today, I have known failure. I know I done have to hate a hapless teen who died trying to live. Sometimes we don’t do our best. Sometimes we try our best and our best sucks. Before addiction, I would have asked, rhetorically, how could she do that? I would not have waited for the answer because I would have thought I had the answer. Today is a better day inside of my mind. Today’s mind is a curious one, one that asks “How could you?” And actually waits for the answer.

When I was trying to be perfect I judged people even more harshly than I had been judged. And I hated a lot of people. It’s easier not too. Pkus, now that I listen I get to hear great stories.

Does this American 🇺🇸Need to Travel ✈ to Greece for COVID-19 Testing While Some Hawaii Residents Cry “Hoax!”

Greece, a Small Country Doing Public Health Right

Greece, with its ancient ruins available for tourists to see, is about to reopen for much needed tourism. Greek government officials have told the world that as far as the worldwide pandemic is concerned, Greece is a safe place to visit. Through widespread testing and strict quarantine procedures for its citizens and travellers the country has kept COVID-19 to a minimum. I listen carefully to news from countries that have effectively dealt with the treat of COVID-19 and indeed, widespread testing seems to be of paramount importance. That’s what public health officials in the United States have been saying.
Hawaii has been fortunate. We have had relatively few COVID-19 cases. Just yesterday, May 15, 2020, o heaed two people speculating that COVID-19 is probably a hoax. Have you ever met anyone who knows someone who knows someone who caught it here? No. I don’t believe COVID-19 is a hoax although I can’t go see other locales. I doubt all of the media could uniformly cooperate to pull off such a hoax and to what end? We have been fortunate to be naturally quarantined from the rest of the world and within the state the separation of islands helps.

Our nation’s leadership speaks work on a vaccine but best case scenario is 2022..? A scientist the POTUS had fired spoke to Congress about the sister we are facing without universal testing and said leadership ignores his words at our peril. The response? The scientist was called bitter, and he was accused of considering himself a soloist when he was just one if a choir. Seriously? Any scientist working with others at the federal level must be good enough to carry a tune. He must know something. And what about his warning? No comment.

Hawaii needs it’s tourism too. But can we safely reopen on wishful thinking? We ask visitors to quarantine themselves in their far flung destinations. There’s no one place new arrivals go for quarantine (like Greece) and enforcing the voluntary quarantine (an oxymoronic arrangement) is spotty. Hawaii is not testing all new arrivals. Or residents.

My Fingers Are Crossed, The Way Kids Do, For Luck

I am holding out hope that cases will remain relatively few here so we can wonder if it’s all a hoax, this COVID-19 no one has seen or heard of before. No promise of universal testing. We are told to pin our hopes on a vaccine in 2022..? But I worry that here in Hawaii our luck, luck we did not make, will run out.

A Philanderer Teaches His Son How to Cheat with Class

Son, do whatever you want to do and a good girl will never ask you where you’ve been. You don’t want to hurt a good wife by having her find out things she doesn’t need to know. Make sure you get rid of love letters, cards, phone numbers, anything that shows you were with other women. That way when you die and she is cleaning out your stuff she doesn’t find the evidence. Protect her feelings. If she is a good girl who doesn’t ask you where you’ve been. (I am sure this generation of philanderers would add clearing your phone of evidence.)

“Don’t Touch Me!” People are Surprised that Sex Workers Feel This Way

Prostitution is Not About Intimacy and that’s why it’s successful

When men pay hookers they are not paying for sex bc they are so unappealing no one would voluntarily have sex with them. Men always pay for sex. If they are with a prostitute they pay cash. If the woman is not a prostitute she expects payment, for sure, but not in cash. He must offer her real or feigned interest. He must listen to her it pretend he is listening. He has to put in time in the form of dates which may cost money but will absolutely cost time, and quality time at that. It is helpful to indicate that he will spend more quality time with her in the future. But some women accept one night stands and know that there will be no additional kindness from him, no more time spent.

A friend once commented that two people he knew who disliked people earned their livings dealing with others. One misanthropic soul was a cab driver. The other person was a sex worker. “Don’t you guys totally deal with people all the time

Why pay for it?

Does anyone think it possible for a man to have sex with a woman and give her none of the aforementioned forms of currency that women value? I noticed the slogan “free love” didn’t last beyond that generation. Just as their baby boomer parents predicted.

Maybe young hippies learned the consequences if so called free sex, like a slew of mixed race babies from interracial temporary unions who were soundly rejected by both the black and white families. Just to give a for instance about the cost of sex. Sex, like every decision, costs. The cost of the decision is is always the lost opportunity to pursue other courses of action.

One reason men pay prostitutes.

Men find it cheaper, easier, and more guaranteed to pay money for sex instead of just time. So you see, it is quite possible to dislike people and successfully work as a hooker without letting any guy into your inner world. The guys don’t want to know you anyway so sex work is ideal for some hermits. What irony.

Domestic Violence in Hawaii is is Kinda OK

How Does Violence Mean He Loves You? Easy

When hitting is reserved for the intimate partner and no one else, it is quite logical to associate a raised fist with a feeling on exclusivity. In fact, and this just occurred to me, the one way a husband is absolutely faithful is that his wife is the one person he hits. He may visit hookers or even have a mistress. Under circumstances of sexual infidelity, the fact that he hits only the wife can make the wife feel pretty special.

What is the Appropriate Public Response to a Man Hitting a woman? Hint: don’t be a hero.

I Addiction gave me opportunities to met local born Hawaii residents that I would not have had if I had travelled the standard path of hanging out with other educated east coast transplants. My conclusions are based on observations and not statistical facts. Having said that, I have noticed that when a person like me sees a man hitting a woman and takes it upon herself to tell something distracting out of reach of swinging ham hock fists, a person like me is considered rude.

That’s between them. Or, that’s just domestics (domestics with an ‘s.’)

Look the other way, in such a way, that you don’t like you’re looking away. I don’t get subtext. I thought a woman wouldn’t want to be hit. What did I know?

El propósito de expertescort, la ex prostituta en Honolulu

La élite de Harvard se desliza hacia las calles de drogas de Honolulu y sonríe a través del dolor con historias en primera persona de las lecciones aprendidas en el descenso

I hope this translation is correct. Just know I’m trying!

If You’re Working on your credit score you’re giving your money to a pimp– Sexy, Funny Video/Verse unmasks forbidden intimate taboos in Honolulu


The link talks about how bankers are like pimps in that pumps demand a working girl’s money in exchange for protection. From whom? Protection from the pimp. Pay or get smacked around.

Just BC She Was A Sex Worker Doesn’t Mean…Hooker Stereotype vs. Hooker Reality

One Assumption About Sex Workers is they have done it ALL. That’s sooo not true. There are things she is uncomfortable doing but is not opposed to, like any performance type gig such as web cam or stripping and then there’s the list of standards of acceptability developed after hearing requests over the years.

Everyone Has Sex Standards But Not Everyone Has had to Define them Bc You Don’t Know How You Feel Until The Situation Presents Itself. Sex Workers Have more presenting Situations.

Hooker Stereotype: she has or will do anything

Hooker Reality: she has a better grasp on her firm boundaries bc she has had to Define herself to maintain herself.

How does it feel regarding this group of people as people? I know it was weird for me finding out that groups I never thought of as, well, like me, were totally like me. It’s like I had to become everyone I judged to be cured of the burden of judging. What a relief!

Did You Know That A Lot Of People Hear Voices?

I’ve been around mental illness all of my life. I had thought I had seen it all before but I hadn’t. There were things like cutting, which I will cover in another post. There’s also hearing voices. I don’t hear voices but there’s something about the way I talk about my true beliefs that causes mental health professionals of many varieties say, not really ask, “You hear voices…yes?” No, I do not. In the words if the question that tries to be neutral in tone, I do not have exceptionally good hearing that allows me to hear what others don’t. I have been surprised to discover that people I had been around for years heard voices. Some said they heard their name whispered rapidly, ceaselessly. Like CaroleenaCaroleenaCaroleenaCaroleenaCaroleena. One person I knew said she heard voices calling her a thief. I was actually pleased to hear it bc it seemed to me like she felt guilty for all she stole and I thought she had no conscience. If you are around people who trust you or who think you aren’t in a position to harm their reputations (in other words no one cares what you say), you might try asking them if they hear voices. I’d be curious to know if the general population on non-addicts hears voices too.

Mental illness is all around us. Some might find that comforting

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