HOW I WOULD UTILIZE A PRO TO PLEASE MY SPOUSE 12/26/17
When I was a young woman I was married to a man over twenty years my senior. He believed his elder status made it appropriate and even necessary to dismiss my immature wishes. I also viewed him as the leader in our relationship as my husband and my elder. My spouse applied his monarchical rule to our sex life, which had not been a problem because I consented.
After I gave birth to my first born he was jealous of the attention I gave the infant. His reaction was not unexpected for I had read about such things. However, his desire then demand, that I nurse him came as a complete surprise. No, shock. I found the request appallingly disgusting and I refused to do as he commanded. Up until my refusal I thought I had a mentor not a master. My disobedience would ultimately bring the short union to an end. Maybe our separation was for the best but now, with maturity, I see another option besides my steady refusal of his steady demand. Over the years I have learned that there are many men who seek lactating providers. A “boutique” or “niche” or “fetish” provider could have done my (now ex) husband’s bidding without any fuss thus satisfying his desire to dictate terms. I could have been spared the relentless pressure to do something I did not want to do. Perhaps finding the provider myself would have shown my acceptance of who he was without rejection muddying the emotional waters. I was not against the idea of a grown man nursing–but my personal preference was to exclusively breastfeed my own infant. It is possible to accept a person without participating in an activity that forms a part of who he is. Participation in a sex act by proxy is less likely to cause a partner feelings of rejection. “I want to be with you, but I don’t want to do that. How can we both meet our needs?” Utilizing the services of a provider might create a bridge between people separated by sexual incompatibility in an area. Do I think a happy outcome is a guarantee? Reader, you must know I am not that foolish. I am advocating the introduction of other options in the sex lives of consenting adults of the same species (another personal preference). By the way, if you have never read an idea that is outside of the so-called box of standard solutions, you just did!