Rape Prevention Lesson #1
If you are the only female in a room full of men who are getting drunk and there is no authority figure present, get the hell out of there immediately.
Rape Prevention Lesson #2
If a man asks you for sex and you say no, do not stay in the room with him. if you are lying beside him, and he tries something, get out of the bed. He will keep trying to pressure you as long as you stay in the room with him. Men interpret your continued presence as assent.
Rape Prevention Lesson #3
If you angrily and emphatically rebuff a sexual advance your words do not mean anything if you don’t leave. Women will stay because they believe their words have decided the issue and there will be no further problems.
Rape Prevention Lesson #4
If a man touches you and you remove his hand only to find he has ahold of you again, he is not respecting your “no.” Get out of there.
Rape Prevention Lesson #5
Sometimes men will try to make you feel that you owe them because they have been respectful to you in the past. Respect is just the minimum and not a reason to demand a reward. Don’t feel bad about losing his friendship because there is no friendship to lose– due to his deficiency not your frigidity.
Rape Prevention Lesson #6
If the encounter turns violent you are going to have to decide if it is better to fight back, or submit. Women have guessed wrong and been killed. You will have to use your instinct.
Rape Prevention Lesson #7
There’s a third option besides fighting and submitting. The option is shocking your assailant with a bizarre reaction. I have gotten out of bad situations by immediately applauding my approval, ripping off my clothes and barking like a dog. Notice that jolt of surprise you felt when you read that sentence? You want to shock them with crazy. Don’t just submit, get enthusiastic, demand that they get on with it. Freak them out by standing on your head. I am so serious. You must keep your wits about you and stay calm.
Rape Prevention Lesson #8
Now is not the time for modesty. Be willing to make a run to a major road totally naked and screaming at the top of your lungs if you must. Get into the mindset that whatever you have to do, you WILL do. You can snap into that mentality more easily if you have a physical move that signals to your brain it’s go time, like snapping your fingers. People can sense when you’ve become deadly serious and it gives them pause.
Rape Prevention Lesson #9
Never, ever respond to threats with fear because you are rewarding his behavior. He will keep threatening you, keep hurting you like a lab rat in an addiction experiment that presses the cocaine reward button until it collapses. Never show fear to someone trying to scare you. This lesson is applicable in many situations.
Rape Prevention Lesson #10
Don’t say you have AIDS. He will respond “Me too.”
Don’t assume that because you know the guy he would never hurt you. You may not know him drunk, or under pressure, or feeling rejected, or going through a major life ordeal. Amazingly, I didn’t have incidents with any clients. The two bad incidents I had were with people I knew. Yes, I do believe I will follow up with the stories. Know this–the statistics are true, you have more to fear from the people you know than the people you don’t.