Today we live in a culture where everyone is so hypersensitive to insults. I don’t want anyone to be insulted by what I write. I do admit, in the interest of cringing honesty that I would love to get the attention a controversial post brings, sure, I admit it. I do not want anyone to have hurt feelings because my advice applies to precautions one needs to take with female providers but there is a certain twist I want to discuss about our transgender co-workers (totally lame pun intended)
I have never seen an article that notes an interesting fact. When guys pick up a transgender provider (trannie, colloquially, if that is not offensive), they want to kinda forget are in the company of a man. They want the excitement of the forbidden fruit, they want to indulge the homosexual inclinations that many of us have but suppress, yadda yadda yadda. Yet , people sometimes need to tell themselves, I am with a woman, and they push the awareness of the other person’s masculinity away from awareness. In Hawaii, society makes denial easy. If a person dresses as a woman, everyone refers to her as a “her” and in conversation you might not even know the person central to the discussion isn’t a biological woman unless someone mentions it, which usually happens.
THE RISK OF DENIAL
Guys are very used to not feeling physically threatened by women and for good reason. I remember the first time I was hit by a man. I was 24 years old and married, and my soon to be ex-husband punched me squarely in the face. I still remember my overriding thought:
This is why men rule the world.
The strength in that first punch from a man was a whole other level, greater than anything I had ever experienced. I knew I had no chance to win by fighting back so I concentrated my efforts on getting away. To this day it astounds me that women can survive a lifetime of being beaten. Anyway, I understand why men do not think a woman can overpower them. For the most part, she cannot. But when she is not a biological woman, she has all the strength of a man. I know of several situations when transgender providers invited a co-worker to join the rendezvous. One person sits next to the trick in the passenger seat, the other person is in the back seat. The trick does not realize it, but he is outnumbered and out positioned, and soon, he is out of pocket when they rob him. I will speculate to say that once the male aggression kicks in, there is almost a competitiveness to really get the guy, especially if some secret grudge is simmering. These guys can be very vicious.
WHAT YOU NEED TO REMEMBER
No matter what fantasy you as a client want to experience you must keep one foot planted in the reality that you are dealing with a man, or men. This person(s) could be bigger, younger, stronger, and very much at an economic disadvantage, especially if you go to Honolulu’s downtown area where people are working the streets to support addiction–their own and usually someone else’s as well. If you picked up a homeless guy in downtown Honolulu, you would have your guard up, you know you would, and you should. Do not fool yourself into thinking “she won’t or can’t hurt me.” Let us be really real–she could and possibly would hurt you to steal from you. When it really counts, money wise, she may just pull out her masculinity and use it to her advantage and your disadvantage. She is a he, no matter how much anyone wants it not to be so. The truth is just the truth.
DISCLAIMER I NEED NOT WRITE
Do I need to say I am not talking about everyone, that you can’t judge a group by the actions of a few? I don’t have to run those lines by my intelligent readers, right? Thank you.