“Abducted in Plain Site” is a documentary on Netflix that just blew my mind. I never thought of the complex and long term plan of a child molester seeking unimpeded access to a child. I know about grooming, which to my understanding, is forming a relationship of trust with the child so that the child wants to please the molester, and will keep his confidences while the child struggles with the conflicting feelings of shame and burgeoning sexual pleasure all mixed up with the thrill of having a secret and feeling special. The child feels this way, not because she is loved but because she is being made into a victim to be used, abused, hurt physically, and ultimately rejected when the abuse is discovered and he has to portray the victim as a liar, or when he moves on the the next victim. The victim feels so torn between feeling rescued and feeling bereft of the company of the person she so loves and trusts and is familiar to her and only to her. She will feel betrayed, like he is cheating on her, when she discovers she was not the only 7 year old (for example) in the abuser’s life. Fortunately, for me, I never experienced the love of a 40 year old towards my 4 year old self (for example of an age). I never had to struggle through the murkiness of lies and even literal drugs to get to the truth of sexual abuse but here is what I want to share with you about this video: the sexual seduction of both parents. Unbeknownst to either parent, this guy was seducing them in order to tear them apart as a couple and to distract them with this exciting, forbidden affair that they had never experienced. I was like, wow! And a horrified wow, at that. I never saw such a story.
In this video the child is 12 in the 1970’s when this neighbor and fellow church member abducted the child and took her to Mexico where the legal age for an adult to marry a child is 12. (Hey, right here, in the 21st century United States, an adult can marry a 13 year old in some states, so cloaking rape in the sanctity of marriage vows and it is all good as far as some people are concerned). Now, I want to be clear that the family in the video is Mormon and although I think that made them more susceptible to accepting a grown man with a girl, I think that the primary focus of the con game was not the religion but of using the family and destroying the family to get to the girl. I have never seen such obedience to a predator in my life. To be fair, these days were before talk shows depicting everyone who had a story to tell about sexual abuse. It is realistic to think that these sheltered people knew nothing of pedophilia. After all, had I not seen the talk shows in the 1980’s I would have no knowledge of adults who look to children for sex, and what’s more, I would know nothing about adults who seem to interpret the child’s actions as a warped consent.
I want you to see this video because I want you to be aware of something I knew nothing about and believe me I thought I had seen it all. I never knew this kind of con game existed and I want you, my dear readers, to know what you need to know to protect the people you love, and maybe, steer someone going the wrong way away from children (if that is even possible).
This video is worth your while, but as for me, I cannot bear seeing it all at once because it is that upsetting. The mother, the father, and the daughter were all preoccupied with the forbidden sexual relations with this person who knew what he was doing every step of the way. My God, I never knew people could be so evil and I am humbled to understand, at last, that I do not even begin to know it all. Sorry for my arrogance. I won’t make that mistake again, especially not with you my dear Readers. Join me in this lesson so we may learn together about this cancer disguised as a human being.