Plenty of guys like women they believe they don’t have to respect
One thing about people who say they want to help those they disdain
When people offer to help people that they do not respect somehow it makes them feel a sense of power. The offer of help seems to install them as some sort of authority. The person who is ostensibly being helped is not allowed to ask questions or make any changes or contribute in any way to the thought process. You are just supposed to be grateful for the thought that someone will help you. And I say thought, because true help is hard to find even among well meaning people. The contemptuous seldom get past the thought process and into action. Why? In reality, when people think about helping other people it is coming from a position of superiority. Superior people do not allow underlings to question them. Offers of help are easily replaced with anger at the pitiful person’s gall for being anything other than slavishly grateful. Even curiosity is not welcome. How dare you ask for information, clarification? It is quite enough for you to know that they have had the thought and your input is an affront to their sense of dominance. Equals ask questions. True subordinates just obey. The helper gets angry and withdraws their offer, always blaming the underling for not being open to their obvious superiority.
Now I understand why there is a change to people saying they are in service rather than they’re helping. I understand why Jesus said he was the servant. I offer you a text message from someone who said he was concerned about my writing career and wanted me to draft a text that an editor could look at for potential publication. He had certain thoughts about me asking if the connection to an editor really wanted to speak with me. He shared those thoughts in this text that I did not edit at all. Read the text response to my question about is he going to contact me and if so, does it matter if he himself is on or off the island since everything is done remotely.
Wow! No he doesn’t know you exist. I had a friend come to the island, and what to know if I had a friend he could visit, I said, yes. You. Then he said that you were speaking ill of me. Also, that you requirement was to read a post. I said, ok, wow! So, I thought maybe, I could have been a better person tours you. So, I read the post 5 months ago, and then remembered about it when I got here for my vacation. But, if you want to be rude, and cynical, hey do you. Stay in your little world, in your little apartment, in your blog, and do shit with your life. I really was trying to help you. Maybe, you could become a famous writer, and do something in this world. But, I got you. You’re happy we’re you are.
If you wonder about me speaking I’ll of him, he is referring to a text I (supposedly) received from someone who knew him. He asked if we were friends and I said I knew him but we were not friends. I don’t think there was a separate person who contacted me. It was him all along. Now that I reread his text, he started off saying this other person didn’t know I existed which does not agree with him introducing him to me.
What’s funny is that even when people are lying, they expect you to appreciate them as if what they said were true. After all, you don’t know there’s no editor. Given what you know, your attitude is not grateful enough. This is the same anger the guy who kept my car felt when I demanded he return it. I did not know he wasn’t giving it back. Given that I was supposed to believe he was fixing it, I was terribly demanding, wanting it back like I did. See? That’s why he kept the car. See, that’s why he wouldn’t have introduced me to an editor even if he knew one.
How does it feel to be talked down to? It actually feels like I have been proven right. The person is what I knew they were. I feel a bit smug, as unlikely as it is to admit pleasure at being right.