My Worst Betrayal is why I am alone now…wp_story1618244613330_0

My best friend would have been my boyfriend but he was mostly gay and had complicated feelings for me, as a woman. Our relationship was a series of extremes but I loved him and lived for the day he wouldn’t punish me with the silent treatment after an especially great time (that was his pattern.) He was from Massachusetts and a huge Patriots fan. He came over the Saturday night after the Patriots made the Superbowl. I was thrilled to wake up and find his phone was beside me in bed. That meant he was still there. I had had my doubts bc he was coming off of a bout of the silent treatment towards me during the week. I felt purely happy when I got out of bed to join him in the kitchen. It was in the kitchen that I found his dead body. The autopsy took 4 months to deliver final results bc toxicology and other tests take place thousands of miles away. During the waiting period the people who comforted me were telling others I had killed him. They spoke of our volatile relationship, going so far as to contact police and medical examiner. Why? Bc they had sold him drugs and if those drugs had killed him they could’ve gotten in trouble. The results of the autopsy was death by accident due to mixed drug intoxication. No large amount of something like an overdose but with 7 drugs in his system, no way to know which drug or what combo had been fatal. Also, the artery that is most important for supplying the heart was 75 percent blocked. I did not kill him, no one did, but my “friends* set me up in case a scapegoat was needed. I have been alone since 2017. My friend never got to see the Patriots win that Superbowl.

I never held their whiteness against them

But I also found out that my race was always on their minds and always had been. Of course when you first meet someone you notice their looks but when you get to know them you think of them by name. Not–the tall guy, for example. When it came to me, the person who had introduced me to my best friend referred to me as “that black girl.” She had known me for ten years. When my friend died she became concerned that his family would review his finances and find checks written out to her in handwriting that was not his, and the checks were signed in this unknown person’s handwriting. For her purpose of distracting the family from her fraud she told them the black hooker killed him and had robbed him too. At that time she was out on bail awaiting sentencing for the robbery charge she picked up when she bit the security guard at Macy’s in Windward Mall. She was looking at 10 years. And if the sentencing judge had heard she picked up a new financial fraud felony…a happy ending for her would be unlikely.

Last of all, I felt betrayed by the administration. God let me feel love and snatched it away. So I really know what I am missing.

It is hard to pray with the belief that Someone with my best interests at heart is hearing and rearranging things to benefit me. You can understand my scepticism can’t you?


I was targeted by a police undercover sting and got away

I was in 4 police stings when I was on the street. Twice I escaped, twice I got arrested. Here’s an escape

Follow the link above to read my 2019 take on one of the biggest risks I faces on the street.

Disclaimer: I never said my stories are true. I never said they were false. I never guaranteed they are about me. These stories are about experiences that really happened to people in downtown Honolulu, around the year 2000. Just so you know! Thanks for sharing your life with me right now.


The way Hawaii cops see me makes me want to riot

September 12, 2020

In Hawaii🌺 whenever a person calls the police the police “run the name,” or check to see if the caller has a police record. It doesn’t matter that my solicitation charge was 15 years ago. Once the cops see me as a sex worker💋I cannot count on them to help me. Add to the mix my race and my outsider status (because I am not from here) and the police cannot even fake professionalism. The way they look at me infuriates me. But it does not surprise. This is what happened today⤵️

The Real Police Are Superior Humans

It makes me angry when losers who scammed their way into a respectable profession put in a uniform and give everyone a bad name. On this day 29 years ago I was marveling at how almost everyone was running away from the World Trade Center while the police and other first responders were running, yes running, towards the disaster. They had to know not all of them would make it out, but they gave their lives for strangers. The Apostle Paul wrote while we were yet enemies, Christ died for our sins. I was privileged to see the love of Jesus in action through the NYPD. I have nothing but respect for those people. Let me be clear about my attitude towards people who do I job I am incapable of doing, and who are the only people in my life who will come help me if I call.

The former Honolulu Chief of Police 👮 Awaits Sentencing

Lots of federal charges. His wife was the head prosecutor (true story) and she too awaits sentencing on even more charges they racked up while in service to the people of Honolulu. Drugs, theft, fraud, elder abuse misappropriation of funds, a looong list. Many more charges than the majority of women I met in prison when I was there for possessing a single pill. It’s little wonder that this type of leadership produced the clown that showed up at my place an hour ago. I noticed broken glass that indicated a break in. I knew I had to make a police report or people would say, it couldn’t have been a big deal if you didn’t call the police. I dreaded the unprofessional attitude of the officers who typically show up when I’ve called. I have two assaults by two different neighbors on video, and neither person was arrested. The cops thought it was funny. That’s why I dreaded calling HPD today. I knew they’d communicate their standard message to me: you don’t matter.

Experienced Jerks Know How to Disrespect the Public w/o getting in trouble

Two officers responded to take my report. One was young, enthusiastic. He actually looked at the jealousie window I know was a replacement for the one that had been broken. You see, I had the windows secured so the only way to get in was to break the window. I come home to a pile of glass shards and a different window. It takes less than five minutes to insert one of the glass slats known as jalousies. The second so-called cop was dismissive, and what infuriated me was the casual way he leaned on his elbows against the railing, never moving until he walked off without saying anything to the other officer. His body position is not something that could convincingly be communicated to others. People would say it is a matter of opinion. He had found a way to be a total douche without the public really being able to replicate what he did. The only things he said was he saw no evidence the glass came from my window. I said since he never looked at it , how could he. I asked if they could at least do fingerprints. His response was Forensic Files was a show for tv that bore no resemblance to actual police work. When he walked off I told the young one not to follow the example of indifference and disrespect. The young one will be lost if his training days are spent with that total douche. Even now I am frustrated bc nothing I wrote seems unreasonable on the cop’s part. I simply cannot translate his slouch into words to explain why I’m so furious. Maybe I am overly bitter about a lifetime of being nothing much in the eyes of people who see my little brown face and make their assumptions.

One thing I am sure of is that the older cop was nowhere near the level of the NYPD 19 years ago. This guy, casually leaning back on his elbows, would never have run back into those buildings. I wish people would make the distinction between the guys behind police brutality and police indifference, and genuine officers who rise to be heroes when that’s what’s needed.

Addiction and Prostitution in Hawaii

Sex Workers Are a Diverse, Not Desperate, Group

Jack the Ripper and the 19th Century’s Sex Workers in London

Jack the Ripper was the “nickname” journalists in 19th century London gave to a serial killer who preyed on prostitutes. At that time prostitution was not illegal in London and there were scores of women selling sexual services. There were women who charged high prices, who were comfortably situated in housing and they therefore had a place to invite clients. Women without financial backing worked the streets. They had to find a hidden spot in public to perform sexual services. These women could not offer comfort so they had to charge less. The same is true in downtown Honolulu, especially in the early 2000’s before the community took pains to remove the streetwalkers. The difference between a streetwalker and a call girl is expressed in the names. The lower status women walk the streets, the call girls can receive callers in person or are summoned by receiving phone calls.

How does a woman reach the point of being without help and resources? Addiction. In London 100% of the streetwalkers in the area targeted by Jack the Ripper were addicted to alcohol. Today, there are streetwalkers on those same avenues and 100% of these sex workers are heroin addicts. Let me be sure to clarify my remarks by stating that not all sex workers are addicted. Yes, there are women who engage in sex work but in general, they consider it something they do on the way to doing what they really want to do. People scoff at the notion that people could just dabble in sex work but they do. And, sex workers do not always work out of desperation. Sometimes they save money and invest in stocks. Or, they get plastic surgery. Can you really say a woman is being taken advantage of if she is saving for a tummy tuck.?

There are exigency circumstances that are not directly related to addiction, such as a woman being unable to find regular employment because of her record. I have even heard of women who left downtown Honolulu but return to work the street a few times a month to stay current with the goings on and to be a familiar face to guys who drive around often but do not always pick up a worker.

I received the criticism that I am misrepresenting sex workers as down and out and that’s not always true. There can be no denying that there is addiction driven prostitution that both genders adopt only bc they use drugs. They would never have considered prostitution anything more than something you read about in a blog. That was before drugs. But after people become addicted there are very few ways to make money that take as little time as 15 minutes, after which a person can dash off to score dope. They spend all the money on drugs then hit the street again. The practice of spending every penny on dope is what makes it impossible to keep a place or replace a stolen phone. It is this addiction driven prostitution that I primarily expose.

Another misrepresentation I do not want to commit is downplaying the danger of sex work, especially on the mainland where hundreds, maybe thousands, of sex workers are killed along interstate highways, and not to stereotype long distance truckers, it’s believed that predators discover the possibilities for truck drivers to snatch a woman no one will miss from one jurisdiction and dump her body in another jurisdiction where police do not know she went missing elsewhere. The lack of communication between law enforcement in different areas is a big weakness in policing in the United States and every full time predator knows this It would be impossible to get away with these actions on any of the Hawaiian islands. People will find out someone’s missing and people will know about the predators. If we have anonymous murders in Hawaii, I have never heard about them. However, the former chief of police and his wife, the head prosecuting attorney have both gone to federal prison this year(seriously) so we cannot exactly trust our authorities to tell the truth.

Criminal Justice system Hooker Hacks

Snitches I Know Do Not Fit The Stereotype, Exactly – Witty Videos and Verse by the Harvard X-Hookr in Hawaii

I am told it is the police and not the criminal who initiate the snitching
— Read on

Criminal Justice system

Snitches I Know Do Not Fit The Stereotype, Exactly

Snitches are typically portrayed as seeking opportunities to betray unsuspecting fellow criminals to police who don’t respect them but will use them for the greater good. In truth, from what I have been told, police recruit people to act as snitches and send them on assignments. I was told by two different people that after they were arrested an officer said, “I thought we would be hearing from you.” No one wants to look like a snitch so both people told the story as if they blew off the cop who approached, but I know better. People do what they have to do to stay free or get free. One clue someone is a snitch is an inexplicable release from custody. I knew someone who told me an associate had been arrested at 2 a.m. on a Sunday. I called cellblock and he was there are 3 a.m. I called cell block at 6 a.m. and there was no record of that person in the system. I later asked him what happened. He said they took him into a cell in the dungeon-like holding area and asked him for names. According to him they were surprised that they did not know him since he was “so big” as a dealer and he knew so many people. He said they mentioned people to him, he did not volunteer names. If they said a name he knew he confirmed he knew that person since they obviously already had the information. Despite minimizing his role, I think he was very involved in telling on people he pretended to befriend. Or, he was lying to the police about what he was doing. Either way, he was not someone who could be trusted because he was perfectly willing to lie when it suited him. And like most liars I have met, he never called his lies, lies. They were just things he had to say. What disturbed me was one of the people he confirmed for the officers would commit suicide by cop, meaning he pointed a gun, unloaded I heard, at officers, knowing they had to shoot. The informant claimed he kept the guy in the loop about what the police were asking. Even if this was true, could the guy have felt hopeless knowing the police were actively pursuing him and his fate was in the hands of that iffy person. Who knows. What I do know is police are often catalysts and not criminals.

#LinkstoMyBlog Discrimination Racism YouTube

Watch “Racist Attack Caught on Film +Unpunished” on YouTube

Escort Answers

My 4 Prostitution Arrests with YouTube Street Sex Link

Police Stings Defined

A police sting is when the Honolulu Police Department decides to devote several hours to arresting people doing a certain thing by going undercover and posing as a co-conspirator. The target does the transaction with the undercover and once the verbal agreement is made the other cops show up, these guys in a few niforms and black ski masks. Talk about a traumatic scene! Hawaii is so small the Undercovers in ski masks and uniforms are probably recognizable. I have been in 4 Prostitution stings, during which I dealt with an undercover cop posing as a potential date. The undercover pulled over for me, I got in, and the undercover tried to get me to agree to a specific sex act for a specific amount of money. Two of the stings I got away, two I was arrested. This was in the early 2000”s almost two decades ago. But when it comes to prostitution there’s no statute of limitations on the stigma. I believe prostitution is by far the best he most stigmatized of non-violent crimes, and people will cut people slack for beating someone up before giving a hooker a break. I will show you a video clip of the spot I was standing when I was picked up all four times. Why did I go back to the spot? Bc that’s the known area and literally hundreds of times I got away with it, as did all the women spaced 50 meter intervals the length of Kukui Street. People say prostitution contributes to the illegal drug economy. I say, yes, I contributed to the illegal drug economy. They say it makes the area unsafe. Here in Hawaii there was virtually no gun violence. There’s no dangerous area here like on the mainland. Maybe that’s why I’m still around. It’s always possible that I should have been afraid but didn’t know any better. Even though I got off the street when the kids walked to and from school, and we just wore regular clothes not stereotypical hooker garb, I brought nothing positive to the neighborhood. Unless… I deserve props for taking money people happily gave me and not stealing , but I did steal a bit from tricks that got rough if they took me to their places, which they often did if they were single. I called it a tax and I still don’t feel bad, but I stole if the guy seemed to have plenty, so I didn’t have a heart of gold. I just wasn’t as bad as most drug addicted streetwalkers with a $20 minimum. High praise, indeed. Yes, I understand why HPD came after me and I don’t blame them bc I believe that transaction should be done privately out of the public’s eye.

Details on the four undercover police stings and two Arrests will follow. Here’s the YouTube video link to the site of my Arrests at this he heart of street sex economy: