Success is an event but also a journey from striving to arriving. This rite of passage is fraught with danger for the uninitiated but you will use these words to prepare for a successful trip that does not go off course into self destruction.
See my Quota contribution for what you never knew about the motivation of drug users, gamblers, sexual compulsives, etc…Answer to Why do you do a bad habit? by Caroleena Renee https://www.quora.com/Why-do-you-do-a-bad-habit/answer/Caroleena-Renee?ch=99&share=734384ff&srid=1LASI
I have evidence that gender, specifically, “correctly” expressed gender, is the most powerful factor in forming our thoughts about a person’s character, even in the ABSENCE of an actual person to serve as an example. We have all been shaped by gender role lessons. Allow me to explain how I know you’re like me, and you have also judged on this basis.
You don’t need a person in front of you to be influenced by the lessons we are taught about what makes a proper girl or boy
Think about anticipating the birth of a baby who will be important in your life. Isn’t it true that imagining the baby’s gender has the greatest influence over your thoughts about the future person? You imagine her appearance, her likely name, how you will dress her, activities you’ll share, all you will give her that you went withou, the relationship you plan to create, etc. There is no other variable that exerts such a formative influence over our plans for the unborn. Not race, age of birth parents, region of birth–name any characteristic. Only gender gives you fully formed images about the unborn person. Ever imagine what you’ll do with a fellow native New Yorker, for example. That’s the considerable power of societal gender role expectations. Pretty significant pre-existing notions, yes?
If you’re an addict in touch with family you’re like a deaf person on the outside looking in at what you’ll never have, not in your present state. Solution? Strive to be blind
Maybe lifelong blindness forms a protective cocoon. Isn’t that what people want when they embrace repression and denial? Being out on the street wasn’t so bad when you turned a blind eye to the regular stuff you were missing, career, family, all that. Especially, certain people you miss and you are failing. If you don’t see them maybe they don’t exist. Blindness gives that consolation but being deaf might feel like standing on the outside looking in. Too painful. It’s this pain that causes addicts to stay out of touch with family. Not bc they don’t care. Somewhere in cyberspace I know there’s a reader who will take comfort in knowing their beloved addicted person doesn’t stay away out if malice or indifference. It’s like she’s deaf and trying to make herself blind. Makes sense to the convoluted mind of an addict. Don’t personalize.