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When a man sees a woman in revealing clothes, this is what he hears

“This body is for you”

That’s the message a man gets when he sees a woman in revealing clothes. A variation on what a man hears with his groin is often:

“This body could be for you”

Another statement his groin makes to the man’s brain is:

“This body is up for grabs.”

The next step is to take action.  He sees something he likes and the next step is where men and women diverge.  That’s when the trouble begins.  He sees what he likes and he takes action to try to obtain the use of the body for his pleasure.  He does not end his assessment with a view and a thought, a man does something about a woman in skimpy clothes and he believes that her style of dress indicates that she wants him to make a move.  I for one, had no idea I was making an offer I was in no way prepared to back up.

I remember being a young girl, like say 13, and  enjoying the thrill of receiving obvious male attention for the first time that I ever noticed. Looks. Comments. Crude remarks I pretended not to like. He thinks I’m cute, I believed, and I was right. I did not know that for the man, the interaction wasn’t necessarily over for him when it was over for me.  Yes he thought I was cute, but having established that fact, he was past considering my appearance and on to the next logical male decision:

A man sees bare skin and he automatically wants to have it. For at least a slice of a second, the reptilian brain rules

Help yourself

That’s what a man hears and that is what he tries to do to the utmost.

Thirteen year old girls often feel adults are being ridiculous when they scold the girls for wearing skimpy clothing. That is because young girls do not understand what adults know.  No grown up ever explains that the sight of a breast causes the man to, perhaps, picture the girl on her knees for an uncomfortably painful period of time, servicing him in a way she did not know people truly practiced.  No one tells her the bald truth of the message they are unwittingly putting out there for all to see.

I never fully understood why women were accused of “asking for it” based upon how they were dressed if they became rape victims. Then I figured it out. Women accused of “asking for it” were in fact being scolded for breaking a promise they freely made. Once a woman says yes or is perceived to have said yes, it is almost impossible for her to withdraw that consent without repercussions. The least of these repercussions is criticism from society. But the repercussions could be as serious as having their change of heart disregarded and worse still, physical punishment for “teasing. ”

Ironically, many women never explain to an adolescent the inferred promise of bare skin and the danger that all too often follows.  Yet, these women angrily expect other females to know what they didn’t even know at that age. Older women are sometimes certain adolescent girls are offering their bodies when really all the girl wants is attention and a new titillating sort of acclaim. I have known grown women blaming daughters for their husband’s, her step father’s, sexual advances.  All too often women side with their husbands against their daughters in a step father triangulation, as if it’s three people on equal footing.  More on this sad fact later.

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Two Misconceptions–one about men who rape, the other about men who hire hookers


Every time I start to tell you about some truth I learned, about how foolish I used to be, I pause and wonder if I will look back at today and shake my head at my stupidity. I just want to let you know I am not holding myself out as an infallible expert but representing what seems right to me at this time. Anyway, when it came to rape and prostitution, I thought the males who engaged in such acts were desperate sorts. My ideas were formed by statements made by men denying their involvement because:

I don’t have to rape anyone. I can get whoever I want.

Rape myth

I learned this statement was not true. Men who rape are not people who would rather get consenting partners but are stuck forcing themselves on women because no one will have them. I found out for myself this was a myth when I defended myself from rapists. I was inspired by the phrase “you can’t rape the willing,” which is closely related to the misogynistic statement “when rape is inevitable lay back and enjoy it.” I took the words in a different way. What if I were to get willing. Suppose I went into what I call full crazy mode and agreed happily, eagerly, demandingly. Would he be able to go through with it. No. Men who rape quite literally cannot rape the willing. I learned in foster care that if someone wants to hurt me, never show pain or they will keep hurting me because my pain rewards them. They will keep at it like experimental rats pressing the cocaine distribution button until they collapse. If you show no pain and no fear, you are just no fun.

I don’t need to pay women for sex. I can get anyone I want.

Prostitution myth

In my experience the #1 reason men want a hooker is they want sex and they don’t want to go through any changes to get it, nor do they want to have any obligations as a consequence of having it. Prostitution is like the fast food of sex, and I mean going through the drive-thru not taking the time to go in. Fine dining is wonderful, but there is waiting involved, talking, listening, getting through the meal so you can do what you really want to do. “Men don’t pay women for sex. We pay women to leave after sex,” said one male reader. I used to be amazed at how little men want to listen to women, and how often they actually ignore women. “I don’t really listen. I just give five “yes-es” and a “no” and she is happy I answered,” said a guy who actually listened to me more than he would have cared to admit. But he didn’t have to listen for all that long and challenge his endurance. He was free to leave as soon as the deed was done. What might surprise some is that I was as glad to see him go as he was to be gone. It was all about let’s get to it and through it.

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Hooker Life Hack #8: A safety tip for women

If a group of men is drinking and you are the only female in an enclosed area, it is best to exit the scene. Alcohol and machismo can be a dangerous combo that produces sexual violence behind closed doors.

By Expert Escort
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